The Feedback You’re Not Getting Is Costing You More Than You Think
When was the last time someone on your team surprised you—with honesty? Not a status update. Not a PowerPoint summary. But a moment where they told you something you didn’t expect to hear—and probably didn’t want to?
If your answer is, “It’s been a while,” that’s not just a gap in communication. It’s a red flag for your culture.
The Subtle Erosion of Truth
People don’t suddenly stop giving honest feedback. It happens slowly. A leader bristles in a meeting. A team member watches what happens to the last person who spoke up. A culture of “we don’t talk about that here” quietly takes hold. Eventually, your people become skilled at managing your reactions instead of managing the business.
You get compliance, not creativity. Silence, not strategy.
Everyday Leadership Moment: The Unspoken Hesitation
Think about a time when someone close to you clearly wanted to say something—but didn’t. You could feel the tension. You saw it in their eyes. But when you asked if everything was fine, they nodded, smiled, and moved on. Now apply that to your executive team. That same moment is probably happening in your meetings—and you’re missing it.
Because truth has a tone. And unless you’re tuned in, it can slip right past you.
Why This Happens in the C-Suite
It’s not because your people are weak. It’s because your title is strong. The power imbalance is real. Even if you invite honest feedback, people still do the math in their heads. “Will this affect my future here? Is it worth the risk?”
It takes conscious, repeated effort to override that equation and build a culture where truth is safe to speak.
“If you want to improve, be content to be thought foolish and stupid.” — Epictetus
But let’s be real—most execs don’t like being surprised or challenged. It’s uncomfortable. Which is why so many create echo chambers without even meaning to.
The Role of Peer Groups
Peer advisory groups change the game. There’s no hierarchy. No politics. Just a room full of sharp, accomplished leaders who are committed to growth over ego.
You hear the unvarnished truth—because in that space, it’s not risky to say it. In fact, it’s the whole point.
And when you get used to receiving that kind of candor, you get better at creating space for it back in your own company.
You model curiosity. You reward honesty. You build a culture where the truth wins.
Bottom Line
If you’re not regularly being surprised, you’re probably not being told the whole story. And in leadership, what you don’t know can absolutely hurt you.
Don’t let fear of discomfort cost you trust, talent, and clarity.
Surround yourself with people who care enough to be candid—and strong enough to tell you the truth.
